Question: I do not want to seem like a Grinch, but I have an issue I think is worth asking about. You see, I am a person of great religious faith. But I am not part of Canada's majority religion. At this time of year, many of my co-workers ask me if I have done my Christmas shopping yet, or if I am going to celebrate Christmas with my family. The thing is, they do not mean to cause discomfort. Yet these questions make me squirm a little, because I do not know how to answer properly without revealing the nature of my own faith. My concern is I do not think that people should be made to feel different at work based on their religious affiliation. Is there a simple way to handle this?
Dianna Z., Charlettown, Prince Edward Island
Dear Dianna,
It is understandable that you might be feeling a little uncomfortable given your situation. In Canada, approximately 77% of the population is part of to the dominant faith. Depending where you live that percentage can range widely. For instance, in the Greater Toronto Area, which is one of the world's most diverse cities, the number is about 55%. However in many smaller towns the percentage can reach 90% or more.
Thus the holiday period in December can be a challenging time for some. At no other time of year do minorities as a whole feel so marginalized. You can either end up pretending to be in the spirit of the season, which may mean downplaying your own identity, or you could repeatedly reveal your own background. Either way, this can be stressful.
It can be hard for people in the majority to understand where this stress might come from. Not that this means they are being deliberately insensitive - far from it, in most cases. It is just that they may not be able to relate easily. For instance, they may have never been in a position where they needed to ask the boss for days off, other than around the week of Christmas, to accommodate their religious customs. Hence they have never been exposed to potential accusations of demanding special treatment, or of somehow being disloyal and not being a team player.
Employers also have a lot to contend with in this area. They must deal with workload balancing, treating people fairly, and adhering to policies and laws. They also need to respect people's privacy and maintain smooth dynamics for their staff. All the while trying to be inclusionary without offending anyone.
So how can you reduce the unease that you may be experiencing this time of year? One way is to make sure you ask for any special vacation allowance well in advance of the holidays, so that you provide those who have to schedule working hours plenty of notice to accommodate you. Another is to know your rights.
Also keep in mind that Christmas is no longer an exclusively religious celebration. In North America, certainly, it has in a number of ways become secularized. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, pre-Christmas sales at the shopping mall: these are all part of an evolving tradition that has little, if anything, to do with religion. Thus when somone wishes you a "Merry Christmas," it is often more a cheerful sharing of goodwill than an edict to become involved faith-wise.
When a co-worker asks what you're plans are for Christmas, you can answer by prefacing your remark with something like "For the holidays, I plan to..." Or, if you are in the mood to share your own traditions, you can take a moment to explain that you will be celebrating a diffrerent event, like Hannukah, Eid, Diwali, Orthodox Christmas, Yule, etc.
Personally I like to think that as our country continues to become more multicultural, increasingly all people will appreciate that this season holds an abundance of varied festivities, and that each one is worthy of learning more about. So in the joyful spirit of the season, I wish you a happy, healthy holiday.
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Mark Swartz, MBA, M.Ed., is
Canada's Career Activist. His insights reach millions as the Workopolis Career Advisor, as author of the best seller "Get Wired, You're Hired!" and as a professional speaker and coach on career/work issues. A former Toronto Star careers columnist, Mark's advice is forthright and practical. For many more free articles, and for personalized coaching, please visit Mark’s site at
www.careeractivist.com.